Growing up I was not the girliest of girls. I hated wearing dresses and skirts, I hated fixing my hair, I had no interest in make-up (and still really don't), pink is not a color I chose to wear, and I definitely would rather watch sports instead of playing with Barbie dolls.
So I'm sure it's weird when I say that I was secretly really excited about going to see "Barbie." I knew it would be overloaded with all the things I didn't like as a child and still don't really care for as an adult (except for dresses, I like those and bonus points if it has pockets!). But I wanted to go and just enjoy a night out with some friends who, like me, wouldn't be considered stereo typical girls by Barbie standards.
I loved everything about the movie. Even all the pink. Where it truly hit home for me is the movie's central theme and the reason I wanted to even do this podcast. In Barbieland, women rule the world. From all 9 Supreme Court justice spots, to the White House, the mail carriers, mechanics, golfers, and everything in between, women are #1! But that's not to say that the Ken's don't have their place. They do and they're awesome, but this isn't about them.
This is about all the women out there who have ever felt like they were not enough in some way.
*SPOILER ALERT! DO NOT READ THE NEXT PARAGRAPH IF YOU DON'T WANT THE MONOLOGUE SPOILED! SKIP TO THE PARAGRAPH AFTER THE PICTURE*
America Ferrera's monologue had me fighting back tears and cheering. Here is one part of it that really hit home:
"You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can't ask for money because that's crass. You have to be a boss, but you can't be mean. You have to lead, but you can't squash other people's ideas...You have to be a career woman but also always be looking out for other people. You have to answer for men's bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you're accused of complaining. You're supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you're supposed to be a part of the sisterhood...But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So find a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful. You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line. It's too hard! It's too contradictory and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault."
Where do I start? I could dissect every line of this but I won't (you're welcome). For me the biggest takeaway is that I have never felt like I was truly enough. I was never pretty enough, smart enough, polite enough, quiet enough, or feminine enough. I am not supposed to know sports better than a lot of men and I sure as hell am not supposed to stand up at games and cheer louder than a man or heaven forbid, yell cuss words! But I do, a lot. Because that's who I am.
And y'all, what kills me about the world we live in is that being a woman in sports means you have to follow all of these rules that are in the monologue above as well as a few others! But why? Who made these rules? Men? Sorry guys, but if a female in sports makes you uncomfortable or is something you see as just a pretty face with a rocking body to look at, you're missing out on some of the most incredible athleticism on the planet as well as an opportunity to maybe learn something. And if someone points out to you that anyone who says that a woman can't talk trash or point to her ring finger as she's about to win a National Championship because that's not how women are supposed to act, well you better recognize real fast that they're reinforcing the double standard that we see every day.
Being a woman is hard. There is no one size fits all. I'm learning to embrace that who and what I am & who and what I love is enough. I'm never going to be Stereotypical Barbie. Maybe I'm Weird Barbie with my team's logo on a temporary tattoo on my face and a scratchy almost non-existent voice after games (but don't ask me to do the splits, that's not happening). And honestly, that's perfectly fine with me and all the Barbies and Kens in my life.
As President Barbie said "That's because they're dream houses, m*therf*cker." And I plan to make The Staredown the biggest, best dream house for women in sports because we are KENOUGH!
